


Crazytown

by robertstanion



Series: 35mm: A Songfic Oneshot Exhibition [1]
Category: Hatchetfield Universe - Team StarKid
Genre: Angst, F/M, Nightmare Time Spoilers, Slightly graphic descriptions of injuries, Songfic, The Black And White, ethan's internal thought process, it's all metaphorical, miss holloway is a bad bith, song: Crazytown - 35mm, takes place after ethan dies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:08:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28055901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/robertstanion/pseuds/robertstanion
Summary: Ethan Green hadn't wanted to end up dead. Fate had other ideas in mind. Now, he needs to escape Drowsytown, but there are a few minor dilemmas in the way...but those dilemmas want him dead. With the assistance of an old friend, does he succeed? `
Relationships: Lex Foster/Ethan Green
Series: 35mm: A Songfic Oneshot Exhibition [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2055153
Comments: 3
Kudos: 6





	Crazytown

**Author's Note:**

> cw: blood, tickle me wiggly- 
> 
> hi and welcome to crazytown fucking enjoy your stay. also i strongly suggest you listen to "Crazytown" from 35mm: A Musical Exhibition whilst reading this. You'll make sense of the lyrics better-

The day had started out as simple as it could have done. He was supposed to take care of Hannah while Lex worked, and the most logical thing he could think of to entertain Hannah was to go and see the new shitty Santa film that was coming out that day in the Cineplex that he may or may not have starred in for a bit of extra cash. He loved working with his dad, but the pay was shitty, and he wanted to get Lex to California as soon as he could. He didn’t want to keep seeing her cry. Seeing her injured every time he went over to the caravan was bad enough, but seeing her hurting outside of that, at school, at his house…she was his light. Before her, he had no ambition, and now with her there, she gave him purpose.

He was broke, so why he chose to go to the shitty site in Hatchetfield instead of bootlegging the tickets was beyond him. He wanted to give Hannah time before himself and Lex loaded all their things up in his beat down jalopy and got the _fuck_ off the island, never to return. Yet, even with that specific knowledge in mind that hopefully they would be off the island, fate had a different chance at direction.

Hannah became upset over something minor, and he attempted to calm her down only for a bunch of crazies to come into the Cineplex themselves. Maybe, if Nurse Barnes had gotten there seconds before, he’d’ve been able to survive each kick, each blow to the face. Now, with a promise to Lex that she’d never get to hear, he found himself floating.

The realm was dark, and it stretched on for miles. He felt relaxed and wary at the same time. Was this death? It was hard to tell. He couldn’t remember shutting his eyes, or passing away as a matter of fact. All he really remembered was the pain that he experienced when that lawyer and his insane partner-in-murder had pinned him to the floor, kicking both his head and his…lower region. The pain had been too much, and now, thinking back to it, he recalled _feeling_ fragments of skull slide off the main body, sliding under the skin in a disgusting motion that sounded like rocks.

As he became more conscious, and started falling further, he felt something drip down the side of his head. He reached a hand up to touch it, and it came back a dark red. His hand began to shake as he patted the side of his face, trying to find the source of where the blood was coming from. His hand, unfortunately, dipped inside a hole that had formed on his temple, and he could have _sworn_ he felt the inside of his brain. He drew back his hand and wiped it against his jacket, shaking further.

He landed on the ground, which felt as if it were watery, and his palms fell flat. He stood himself up, brushing himself off, to notice red beads of liquid roll down his jeans. He looked at his hands, which were stained the same deep red as his fingers had been seconds before. He didn’t need to think about it to realise he was standing in blood. Could it be his blood? He realised that bleeding from the head could leak a sufficient amount of blood out of the body, but _that_ much?

“Okay, Ethan…keep calm, we’re just dreamin’…” he told himself as he began to walk, what he assumed was, forwards. “We gotta keep walkin’…we gotta get home to Lexi and banana…ah fuck. Lexi’s gonna fuckin’ murder me…” he told himself as he began to walk through the blood. “And _dad…_ I’m dead. And grounded. That is…if I ever leave this place…” He exhaled and ran a hand through his hair. “Okay…okay so we’re just…takin’ a stroll…through whatever this place is…and I’m hyperventilating, okay…” He swallowed and continued to walk until there was a breeze on the back of his neck that he slapped. He turned around and saw a greasy looking man stood beside an even greasier looking creature.

“Take a stroll?” The man asked, popping the collar on his denim jacket, twiddling with a chain around his neck, looking to who appeared to be his accomplice.

“Down the dwain…” the creature said, it’s fur wet, as if the suit had just come out of the laundry. Something was telling Ethan, however, that the suit was _not_ a suit, for those tentacles and the eyes seemed to be much more than a mechanic…

“To Crazytown,” they said in unison, and a variety of screeching giggles echoed around the realm. Ethan tried to pinpoint who they were coming from, but wherever he turned, he saw the flash of green and nothing else. When he turned back to face the man and the creature, there were eight other figures beside them, each resembling those that had been in the advert for the “Tickle Me Wiggly” dolls that Hannah had been so afraid of.

“Well, I guess _I’m_ in hell!” He tried to joke, but the figures tilted their heads to the left in a domino like effect.

“No, no, no, Ethan. You ain’t in hell!” The man barked and Ethan flinched. “Nah, you’re in heaven if anythin’! You’re stuck in Drowsy Town _just_ like the rest of us! Ya see, I know exactly who you are. And I know what you want.” He paused and reached a hand inside of his jacket, pulling out a green apple, extending it to him. “You wanna go to California.”

“How did you-?” He asked, his eyes widening slightly in fear, but the man tutted.

“Oh, don’t you worry ‘bout that now, Ethan. It’s why you wanted the Wiggly dolls, after all.”

“Who are you?!”

“Who am I?” He laughed. “Oh, come _on!_ Ya really don’t know?” When Ethan shook his head, he rolled his eyes. “I’m sure Holly Holloway’s mentioned the name “Wilbur Cross” a coupla times, dontcha reckon?” He smirked and Ethan’s eyes widened, pointing a finger at him.

“It’s you!”

“Who else would it be?!”

“You _killed_ her!”

“Now, my dear boy, killing is…a little bit extreme. Killing was what happened during The Apotheosis with Deb, when she killed Alice. And how that pretty girl fell, and fell, and fell. Just like you! You’ve fallen like Alice!” He said and grinned.

“Alice is here? Alice Woodward?”

“She’s here alright, in _Crazytown.”_ Wilbur purred gesturing behind him. “Welcome to your anthropomorphic circus, Ethan. These’ll be your entertainers. The Sniggles.”

The Sniggles made some sort of noise, like a snake, rustling through leaves on the bottom of a forest floor. As they did, they seemed to grow a couple of inches, and their teeth became much sharper. They grinned towards Ethan, some of them taking a step forward, as Wilbur spoke up again.

“Crazytown!” He said gleefully, his smile illuminating the room he was in. It had to be a room. It just had to be… “Oh, and one more thing…you’re trapped here forever.” At the sound of the words, Ethan began to slowly pace backwards, the Sniggles still walking towards him. “Oh yeah. Welcome to The Black and White. Congratulations, you’re dead! But-“ he said, before being cut off by another figure in a white button up shirt, dark blue jeans, a bracelet hanging off her right wrist and flaming locks of red hair.

“This ain’t no wonderland!” She snarled as she pointed at Ethan. “Ethan, get outta here while it ain’t too late! I’m gonna guide you through this, okay?” The figure said and tossed a cap to Ethan.

The young adult barely had a time to respond before catching the hat, turning around, fleeing in the opposite direction to Wilbur and his old friend, Miss Holloway. He ran quicker and quicker with every passing minute, and he never seemed to get tired or out of breath. He should have realised that things were different here considering he had a hole kicked into his skull that had pierced his brain, and he was walking, talking, and now, running. He laughed to himself as he slid the cap beneath the green flannel that he’d used as a belt that day. He tied a double knot in it to prevent it from coming undone, tightening the grip for it had become loosened throughout the day. He exhaled and ran a hand through his hair again and listened to himself. “Okay…okay so…” He looked around. There were no lights except for the ones he were emitting, and somehow, he knew which path to follow.

Another bout of energy burst through him and he sped up to now inhumane speeds. His curls were becoming loose and falling into his face, but he needed to escape. If Holloway was there, he’d be able to escape. Whenever she was there, it was good news, and it always had been. He’d known about PEIP from a very young age considering that Holloway had been Ethan’s babysitter and primary mother figure for the entirety of his life. While Tony worked in The Body Shop, Holloway would spend time with Ethan, ensuring the wobbling toddler didn’t fall as he practised walking. Now he needed to make said mother figure extremely proud.

“Okay so, I am running mid-around as I’m chased through a town, psychotic- okay now we’re using big words, this is _so_ not rad-“ he said before stumbling over an untied shoelace, landing on his back, blood splashing up on to his face and, subsequently, also into his mouth, which was opened in a small “o” shape as he panted to try and regain as much breath as possible. The good news for him was, as he scuttled backwards, ignoring the pain in his back, that the Sniggles didn’t seem to be following him there anymore. “Aaaah okay this is bad. Used to ‘jeering jackal’ _much_ like my mother crying not-bee dee deep, bee dee deep!” He huffed and found himself scuttling until he heard the familiar rustle of the Sniggles and, with no time to tie his shoelaces, he fled.

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck-“ he said under his breath as he continued to run, ensuring he still had the hat on him.

“You idle _BOY!”_ One of the Sniggles roared, shooting something, and as it hit Ethan’s neck, or brushed just the side of it, he felt it to be some sort of arrow. His panicking rose by about ten percent as he grabbed the hat and examined it. It was identical, if not the same, hat he gave to Hannah earlier on in the day.

“Oh, thank God. Magic hat, help.” He said, shoving it on his head, hoping his curls would remain tame enough so it wouldn’t spring back off again. There was a tingling near his head where the hole was. He exhaled, relaxing slightly, and blinked. When he reopened his eyes, there was money on the ground. He stopped and looked at it in awe. Pounds, yen, dollars…every currency he could name, was in front of him. Probably more, but he only knew the three. He bent down, a smile filling his face, as he began to scoop up the dollars into his jacket pockets, which were now endless, or so they seemed to be. With this amount of money, he could get himself, Lex, Hannah _and_ his dad out of Hatchetfield.

His dad was an incredible guy. He was selfless and accepted mainly everyone, aside from those who weren’t accepting themselves. After the loss of his wife and Ethan’s mom, he did fall into a very rough area. Ethan had been seven, and watching his father come in from the garage and lean over the sink, his shoulders shaking as he sobbed, had been the hardest thing to watch. Ethan never told his dad what he saw. Tony was an incredible guy, still is, but Ethan was never gonna get to see him again.

Ethan was never gonna get to see Lex or Hannah if he didn’t flee the realm he was trapped within the walls of. God, he loved ‘em. He loved Lex for her creativity and wit, as well as her smokin’ hot looks. She truly was one in a million, and he was glad to have her. She was immaculate, and the creative genes passed on to Hannah. Sure, he didn’t understand who Webby was, but hearing about the universe Hannah created in her head was fascinating, and he could listen to her for hours. Now, looking around, he was beginning to wonder if the universe Hannah _had_ supposedly come up with was the one he was stuck in.

Either way, there was the call of the Sniggles from behind him and, once more, stumbled over himself and began to run. He heard a soft voice in his ear directing him to the exit. He needed to get out, he had to…otherwise he’d have died a lost soul, and he’d have left Hannah traumatised for eternity. He scoffed at himself. Some guardian he’d once been to her. He promised to protect her, and he told her to run off instead of running with her. Did dying during a fight count as being a hero? Most likely not.

But the Sniggles, the Jackals, they were close behind, and he found himself diving into what felt like water, but more viscous, more…pigmented. When he came up for air, he was stood back on his feet, and he could breathe again. In front of him was a narrow gap in the ground, and climbing out of that gap were tentacle like sea snakes, similar to an octopus’ leg in form. He panted once more, checking his pockets for the money which was still there, and the voice in his ear spoke again. “So we just went from layer one to layer two…and _now_ I realise that this river…if the exit’s in the west then, then this river is what separates the-bee dee deep bee dee deep- why the fuck do I keep saying that?” He asked himself before shaking himself off. “The east from the west.”

He walked forward, stepping over the gap, and a tentacle snatched at his leg, ripping part of the skin off. He yelped and hopped on his now good foot and grabbed his ankle. He winced at the sight. Whatever had grabbed him had ripped through skin _and_ muscle, revealing his bone. Somehow, that didn’t hurt as much as when he fell on his ass did. “And I’m bitten from the east…which is present…” he said as he carefully put his foot back on the ground, starting to drag it behind him. It’d slow him down, but it wouldn’t stop him. “And I’m heading to the west which is…the past and future? Whatever, I don’t fucking know what I’m saying anymore. Probably ‘cuz I nearly drowned in Crazytown!” He sighed and began heading towards a very small white light at the end of the darkness.

“You’ve twisted like Dorothy,” a softer voice spoke, and Ethan nodded in agreement only to realise he’d been alone seconds before. He turned his head and saw Miss Holloway crouched on the floor, a bandage in hand, wrapping it around the gap in his leg. “And that’s one nasty bite you got Ethan…”

“Yeah, no shit,” he said and huffed. “This fuckin’ place, Crazytown?”

“Drowsy Town, technically, but it goes by both names.”

“Right.” He said before he looked at her. “No offence because now I know you live here but it is a _nightmare_ technicolour- what the _fuck_ does technicolour mean?!” He asked himself, now utterly confused as he tried to locate where the words he was saying were coming from. “I think I’m insane.”

“You adapt,” Holloway said calmly, tightening the bandage before standing up, taking the ‘magic hat’ off his head. Ethan noticed then that she was wearing the same denim jacket that Wilbur Cross had been wearing upon their first encounter when he’d first fallen to the ground.

“Did you-?” He asked, wanting to know if she’d, well, _murdered_ him. His answer came with a shrug, and she began to set off. With the bandage on his ankle, he followed her. “I thought you were dead?”

“Honey, everyone here _is_ dead. Aside from the Sniggles and Wiggly, because they’re eldritch beings.”

“Like Gods?”

“The Sniggles are _not_ Gods. But yes, Wiggly _is_ a God, if you must call him that.” She shook her head, continuing towards the light.

“Jesus…Crazytown…but…but it ain’t no kind of Oz?” He asked, trying to piece together the entire information he’d been given by his former babysitter.

Holloway nodded and sighed, running a hand through her hair as she continued to stride forward. “Once you reach the exit, I’ll hand you off to my mentee, General McNamara. He’s a smart man, a good man. He’ll get you back to Lex.” She pushed open the door to the bright light and looked at him, handing him the ‘magic hat’ back. It was different in colour, green now, unlike the one he’d worn before. “My time stops here, Ethan. I salute you,” she said and offered him a salute before pushing him into the door.

He staggered inside, looking around the room. He swallowed nervously as he looked at several naked depictions of people in there with him. “Okay…I survive from the stream to discover a choking orgy?” He laughed, causing the people to turn the heads. Their hair was all sleek with water, and their eyes were wide and round. One figure was all too familiar. Her short body, her wavy brunette hair, her smile…that was her.

Why was she here? Had Lex died as well, just like himself? Or was she just an illusion? Either way, he knew that body anywhere, and as she sauntered towards him and placed a hand on his chest, he couldn’t help but blush slightly. “Lexi?”

“Look around,” she hummed, her voice more melodic than usual. So, he did. He looked around, and noticed as the pressure on the figure’s necks began to show their veins, and the colour started to drain from their faces. “All those fuckers you have fondled in your fantasies…turning blue.”

“Turning to….” The chorus of figures said as the hands were dropped, and they inhaled sharply.

“The idle boy?” Ethan asked, and they nodded, beginning to walk towards him.

“Yeah, you.”

Lex and another grabbed his arm, dragging him further, and he felt the same sensation as if he were falling, but the others didn’t notice. They drag him inside, and as they passed the barrier, their façade dropped, aside from Lex’s. Blue skin turned bluer, and their faces became a stone mask that cracked in various places, a bright blue liquid seeping through. Blue fuzz appeared on their arms and antennae, similar to a bumblebee’s, implanted themselves in their heads. Lex remained the same.

They stopped, and the hand on his chest that belonged to Lex dragged up and down, and she passed around him, circling him like a vulture around pray. Her hand travelled up and he found himself relaxing. This wasn’t the worst thing they’d done in bed. He didn’t notice the blue figures at all. He didn’t know who they were, but he was focused on Lex. Before he could get in another breath, after he exhaled again, her hand ripped part of the skin away from his chest, dangerously close to his heart, and tightened her other hand around his throat. His green eyes flew open extremely wide, and he began to choke on his breath. “Passing, stroking…and asphyxiating- me-!” Ethan choked out desperately, taking into consideration what was happening, and Lex nodded, humming again, as her figure turned to be like her brothers and sisters.

Her hand reached down and over his jeans, barely ghosting over his lips. “Till your hard-on is so palpable…” She said and went to kiss him again, her hand resting on his inner thigh before she took her true form and Ethan spluttered. She was pushed away and landed in the blood as Ethan turned and ran again, his ankle feeling significantly better than how it had minutes before.

“Okay- okay I gotta go, gotta get out, gotta go, gotta go, gotta get out, I gotta go!” He said until the figures stared snatching at his arms.

“Wait!”

“You!”

“Please, don’t leave!”

“Yet!” They snarled, but Ethan found himself falling backwards as his breath quickened.

“Okay...magic hat…still on head. Cool cool cool, all’s good, all’s good…this is fine.” He smiled as he looked around. “Now I’ve been bought to…a tower of doors?” He asked as he landed firmly on his feet. As far as his eye could see were doors plastered within the walls. Once more, he patted down his jacket and felt the money secure, but also felt something different. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the mystery item, examining it.

“In the pocket of my jacket, I’ve got a copper key, don’t know the door it goes with but the fact is killing me that in the-“ he began to pace the bottom part of the floor “-pocket of my jacket, got this eight inch copper key, but I don’t know the door it goes with and the fact is killing me. In the pocket of my jacket, got this eight-inch copper key but I don’t know the door it goes with but the fact is killing me. In the pocket of my jacket, got this eight inch copper key, but I go door to door to door to door to door and woe is me and woe is me and woe is me and woe is me and woe is-“ he said as he jammed the key in one of the key holes, and the floor bellowed him vanished, causing him to fall again.

“Ah, Crazytown. I should have expected this from you by now. What is it? I’ve got this key, and it led me to something like…like someone with a wardrobe like Lucy or somethin’? I’d like a little help here, Crazytown!” He called, readjusting the cap on his head as he tumbled and flipped backwards. As he fell, he began to notice a lot of different images, many being a Christ-like allegory, but with different pictures graffitied on to the face of the lord. The most familiar to Ethan was the green, soddened face of Tickle-Me Wiggly. He sighed. “Crazytown, Drowsy Town, whatever you are…you sure as _fuck_ ain’t no Narnia.”

As he said that, he landed on the floor, apparently where he’d started out. For, when he looked, the dead or unconscious body of Wilbur Cross lay bent at an angle as well as a couple of the Sniggles. Wiggly was seen at the end of the pathway. Ethan exhaled once more and nodded. “And there’s no exit anywhere…I’m truly dead…” he said as a voice chorused through his head.

_You wing there like Wendy…_

He removed his jacket and tied it around his shoulders so the money within it would be safer, instead of him having to check every so often whether it was still in his pockets. “And now I’m stripping clothes…” he sighed and removed the hat, placing it back in the green flannel makeshift belt, a few black curls falling to the blood, being absorbed like slime. “And, apparently, stripping hair…”

_You tragic fairy island..._

He shook his head and stopped, looking to the small white light he’d originally been heading towards. “Moonstruck and naked, I declare…” he said to the air and sighed. He wasn’t naked, though with the way he’d been exposed that day, he may as well be. “No, this ain’t no Neverland, Narnia, Wonderland…OZ!” He shouted out in frustration. He wasn’t getting home to Hannah; he wasn’t getting home to Lexi.

From behind him came a loud explosion, and Ethan felt the crackle of fire on his neck. Green fire was engulfing the floor he’d been standing on, and it crumbled into nothing. Ethan went to walk towards it, to try and feel the heat, but hit his head on a glass pane. A window, that had since appeared, and he found himself stuck still in the tower he thought he exposed. “Okay…and now I’m watching from the window of this god-forsaken tower as I witness the town on fire…if Drowsy Town can even be _considered_ a town…” He watched as everybody from the remaining Sniggles, the jackal, to the orgiastic mass, expired. He could only watch as the green fire became closer and closer, and he braced himself for impact. What he didn’t notice was the uniformed man with thick golden hair running towards him. As the tower exploded, and Ethan felt himself being ripped apart from head to heel to heart, he didn’t realise the figure had launched himself at Ethan as a bodyguard, a shield. Till the tower exploded in full, Ethan didn’t realise that he was dying all over again until his barrier disintegrated, and he became weakened, enabling everyone to see him.

* * *

The next time he opened his eyes, he was in a brightly lit room. To his left was a young girl with braids and a baseball cap in yellow flannel, a denim backpack on her lap. Next to her was another girl wearing a striped shirt and black jeans, her worn down brown jacket draped loosely over her shoulders. She was comforting the younger girl as far as Ethan could take out. On his other side was a denim-jacket wearing woman with flaming red locks of red hair and bangs, and beside her was a uniform-clad man with thick, golden, shoulder length hair and a scar that reached from the top of his right eyebrow down to the corner of his upper lip. In front of him, and working, was another red-haired woman in a nurse’s uniform, and with an arm wrapped around her waist was a burly man dressed in red flannel and worker’s boots. A young boy was attached to his leg and he had brunette hair and wore a beanie. Ethan forced a smile as he recognised the people in the room in front of him and around him. _Lex, Hannah, John, Holloway, Becky, Tom, Tim._

Hannah must have noticed something was happening, for she squeaked and looked over to Ethan, and Ethan waved at her. “Greeny!” She cheered, and everyone looked to him.

Lex’s head whipped around, and her face was tear stained. “Asshole! Going and dying on me like that!” She said as she slapped Ethan across the face, and he flinched, before he was pulled into a kiss. He smiled then, wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her close.

“Hey…I promised ya I’d get ya to Cali, didn’t I? You and banana? And when do I break a promise?”

“Cross my heart, hope to d-“ Hannah started, and Lex shot her a look.

Lex cupped Ethan’s face and looked at him. “I’m just glad your back.”

“Me too…cuz I just had _the_ wildest fever dream in the world…can I tell ya?” Ethan asked, and Lex nodded. He smiled gently and began to ramble to Lex about what he’d experienced before he opened his eyes.

Holloway turned to John and lowered her voice to a whisper. “The defeat of Drowsy Town stays between us, and nobody else. Got it?”

“Got it,” John said and nodded before turning back to Ethan, listening to what he now thought to be a dream.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> LOL i had fun writing this okay bye <3
> 
> kudos and respectful comments are appreciated !! i hope you enjoyed!!
> 
> anyways boo torture ethan- JOKING i love him


End file.
